Flirtatious divorcee aka Janda Gatal

Even in the madness chaotic of last week the above issue did caught my attention and today I've decided to put it up for discussion or me merely giving my 2cents worth of opinion.

First and foremost I would like to express my dissapointment on how someone from a respectable opposition Islamic party can come out with that disgrace accusations on women. Does he knows what future has in store for him or his wife? Will his wife be label as one should his marriage fail to sustained the ongoing outside pressure. What if he decide to practise polygamy and his wife refused considering that she cannot accept the fact she's gonna have to share his dick with some other woman, and so she file for a divorce, will she be call "janda gatal" too?

But one can't help to wonder.... could there be any element of truth attached to it???

This female colleague of mine was in a horrible mood today that I thought she prolly had a bad weekend. But what can go wrong on labor day which happened to be her birthday. So after a courtesy probe I found out she was upset with another male colleague of ours. So she was involve with this guy for quite sometime and she knows she's playing with fire coz this guy is happily married with 2 kids. At least that's what he told me. And she's a divorcee with 3 kids but my ohh my does she have a body of an 18yo!!! It's no wonder why every guy will drool over her... it was a torture tuesday for her i bet. They had a small arguement on why he's phone call was not pick up the day before and he suspected that she was out clubbing the whole night through. Personally I don't think is any of his freakin' business on her whereabouts because she's not his wife. This is just typical of men... you get so hype about things you're not supposed to be hype about. Nevertheless at the end of the day it takes 2 to tango. If she's in a right state of mind she would have stayed away from the very beginning and if he has any justification of love at all for his wife and kids he would have ignored any signs given.

Anyway after seeing her in her moody mood I stayed away... I can see that it affected her work because she had bluntly turned down an event only because the hall chosen will be close for renovation and she did not offer any other options which is so unlike her at all. And so I returned to my office which happen to be the same office as her 'boyfriend" and he was so engrossed on doing his monthly report that he even asked for one of our office mate to pack his lunch from the cafetaria. At about quater to 5 he walked happily into my office announcing that he has finished his report. We sat and chatted about his children, my nephews and nieces and how we're worried that the first term exam is just around the corner. Just after 5, he politely excused himself saying that he has to get home early to do some math revision with her daughter. Not a sign of moodyness or frustration at all!!! Unless he's just pulling her legs or he's plain professional or he's a damn good actor.

There's a saying in malay "disebabkan nila setitik rosak susu sebelanga" literally means because of one person or incident, others too will get the heat in a bad way. There is a proper english idiom for it..but just can't think of it now.. The above saying blends well with this scenario...

I honestly do not understand why women or men do this things i.e

a) go for other's wife or husband
b) get themselved tangled in the same situation while they were married eg. i'm leaving you because you have someone else bla..blaa...or thinking they have found another perfect soulmate.Mind you..the grass always looks greener on the other side.

Has infedelity become a norm?? because when all becomes norm then nothing becomes wrong.. so is the 'janda' is gatal? or the "jantan" is gatal or both are gatal??

As for me I always feel the women has to set the boundary when dealing with men especially if they're already own by someone because men being men and till eternity they will and always carry the flirtatious character. Emotionally women are much stronger in controlling their desires and needs. I remember a quote from my mom - men will only stop looking at women the moment his soul leaves his body. Till then even at their death bed they will still think about us goddess!!

Some will blame it on fate and destiny. Yes as muslim I believe that fate has been written on us from our mom's womb... but Allah gave us human mind and energy to manoeuvre life physically and emotionally wisely. Allah knows best...