Happy Mommy's Day

~AN EXCERP FROM THE FRONTPAGE OF NST DATED 10TH MAY 2007~


KUALA LUMPUR: What do you tell a parent whose child has gone missing? Can anything you say heal the wound?

Ching Poon was kidnapped on April 25, 2006 and her skeletal remains were found 11 days later
Ching Poon was kidnapped on April 25, 2006 and her skeletal remains were found 11 days later
Tengku Puteri Nur Aqilah Tengku Kamarudin was reported missing after she failed to meet her mother outside her school. She returned to her family last month
Tengku Puteri Nur Aqilah Tengku Kamarudin was reported missing after she failed to meet her mother outside her school. She returned to her family last month
The hearts of more than 1,900 parents continue to bleed for their children who are missing.

Since 2004, a total of 5,996 children aged below 18 went missing from their homes. However, except for 1,904, the rest subsequently returned home or were found.

The majority of those who went missing are girls. Of the four-year total, 3,398 were girls. In fact, girls from the 14 to 17 age group made up the majority of missing children in all four years.

According to Deputy Internal Security Minister Datuk Johari Baharum, 303 children and teenagers below 18 went missing from Jan 1 to April 13.
The good news is that 176 of them have been found and reunited with their families. The rest continue to anguish over the fate of their children.

Johari said there were five main reasons why children and teenagers went missing.

"Most ran away from home because they were influenced by their friends or were persuaded to do so by their boyfriends or girlfriends," he said in the Dewan Negara yesterday.

"Some children left home because of misunderstandings with family members, a lack of attention from their families or the wish to be free from their families.

"These are the top five reasons why children run away from home. There are many more reasons."

He said this in reply to Senator Datin Nik Azizah Nik Yahya who had wanted to know the reasons why children went missing.


"If parents notice any change in their children’s behaviour, they should take immediate action to find out what is wrong," he said.
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It is still very fresh in my mind. I was 10 when I ran away from home. All because I flunk my mid-term math paper. I was scared too death. Math was not my favourite subject and therefore not my cuppa tea. Passing marks just at the border was considerably good for me. I was scared like hell. The fact that I have to get home and show the report card to mommy and abah was terrifying. I can already imagine my dad long lectures and mom's cubit and spanking.

So I decided to scoot. Pack the essentials in my knapsack and off I went with my trustworthy BMX. At that time I remember telling myself that I'm gonna cycle all the way down to Kg. Bharu and live there with my Kak Teh's family together with arwah Wan. I have always have a good sense of direction. I was confident that I'll make my way through.

Siap tulis surat lagi and left it on the dining table. I remembered cycling all the way and upon reaching the Federal Highway at Bulatan Istana-Shah Alam I decided to take a 360degree turn to Kompleks PKNS and hang out at my then favourite place - BBC - Berita Book Centre. I was sitting down reading couple of books when arwah Pak Long found me.

He brought me home and I fondly remember how my dad hug me and told me never ever do that again and how he was afraid of losing me. I didn't remember how mommy reacted but throughout my life after that I knew she observed and understood and till now she has been an understanding mom minus the losing weight issue.....

She sat with me prior to my Penilaian Exam in Std 5. Surprisingly I scored 4A's 1B and that B was for Science. Not bad for one who was always failing math.

Then came SRP. She again found me a good tuition teacher and also sat with me as much as she could. And I did quite ok and got C3 for my math. But I did badly in Geography or was it commerce and it streached my grades. Dad was furious and he wanted to moved me to the school nearer to the house. I went berserk. After 8 years in the same school and I had to moved?? No way..I was adamant. I guess it is only now I realised why mommy was not so pushy on this. She prolly dun want me to freaked out again.

Then came the biggest theory exam in my life. One that I cannot afford to fail. One that at that point of life was crucial in determining my future or so I thot. Mommy could not do much with me during this time because it's mostly subjectives paper. The reading subject was not easy but it was not that difficult either. I just needed to do more revision and less TV. But hell who's gonna help me with Math?? No one...I was so dead.

And true to it, I got P7 for my math, the only one time ever that I passed since form 4. I can't believe it. I so thot I'm gonna flunk it. The rest of other subjects was acceptable and again English save my ass and brought my grade a step higher.

As soon as the result came out, mom and me sat down together and planned my future. She was so determined not to let this one litte devil of hers goes away without at least a minimum scroll in her hand.

She said..ok UBA would you like to try this? Since numbers is not your strength and reading is your life, so you have to get a course that needs more reading and less calculation. So off I went to a college in Langkawi.

I was messed up a little during my college years. I played hard but I never strayed from my intention to get that paper. I promised myself that I would at least do this for mommy if not for myself. Somewhere along the way I was caught up with this web of mess and I had to fight back for my rights to be in class. Again I told myself if I have to beg, I will. And begging I did and I was re-instate. Phewww..that was so close. While waiting to be re-instate I stayed at home for 2 weeks. Mommy was cool about it. Though it was a typical youngsters issue, she did not nag about it.

After I graduated and after lazing around for a month, mommy chased me out from the house. She urged me to look for suitable vacancy day after day. My first job interview, she drove me and even took that couple of steps up accompanying me in filling up the form. Hey...it was my first job interview. Couple of days later, I got the job... She always said I was born on a silver spoon...Mom I think I'm more on the wooden spoon kind..

Mom has played a big part in my life. Even when she was skeptical of me leaving abroad, she let me. And miles away when I needed a shoulder to cry on, she heard me. Her instincts was so strong that as soon as she heard my voice she knew something was wrong. But I told, I'm not coming back yet mom, not yet..I'll stay and fight. All I need was a word of encouragement, her doa and redha that was what she gave me.

It's gonna be an endless list of the so good things about my mom. But being the super mom plus cranky at times she has her flaws too. And these flaws to me was what made her perfect. I would not want to trade her flaws for any other thing. By saying that means, she did not want us to do what we don't want to do but instead to do what we feel is right. Mistakes happen she says, when it does, we fall, then we rise with dignity, we learn from it and re-set our priorities.

I guess I've always kept her in the middle of my on and off feud with my Kak Long. Sometimes I wish my younger sis is me and I am her. Whenever Kak Long put on her silent killer mode like now, anything I have to say I'll tell it to my mom.

Sometimes mom do hurt my feelings but that's just a little dot in my heart unaffected by all those years of sacrificed she did for me and the love she has for me.

She knows me too well that when I quietly left home couple of days 2 years ago in needing a space to myself after a great mental torture by Kak Long she understood when none of the siblings understood.

This was supposed to be a post about why children are running away from home. Because I myself have run away from home too.

However, unexpectedly it turn out to be about my mom and since mom's day is just around the corner, I want to wish my mom a very Happy Mother's Day and I know you've been through a lot, with Abang's death and the pain of not able to see his children grow up. I wish you all the happiness in the world and hereafter.

Mommy please don't stop praying for me to be a better person for no other doa are more precious that a doa from a mother to her children.

I love you and will always have you in my doa.